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In Which Joe Reluctantly Blogs

August 15, 2011

Hello World.

Despite what I prefer to believe is my better judgment, I’m here.  Here to what?  Well, you know. I’m here to…gulp…


I write for myself.  It’s imperative that you realize this.  I’m well aware of the blatant contradiction that lies inside the claim of writing for myself while simultaneously setting that writing free on the internet to be read by an unknown but essentially limitless audience.  So why do it if I claim to write for myself?  At its most basic level the answer to that question is that my best friend wants me to.  His enthusiasm for this site has latched onto some surface of my brain, implanted itself, and now here I am rambling to what I pessimistically assume will be no one.

I realize that “myself” is not a product I can claim sole ownership of, and that the flow of electrons that are my thoughts have their origins in places that existed long before the stem cells that would become my brain began to specialize.   Though most people would agree with this idea on the surface, we still struggle on a daily basis to separate ourselves from the herd, to prove our uniqueness to others, and even more so to ourselves.  With the advent of Twitter and Facebook this is more apparent than ever.  Through tweets and status updates we imitate the great Kilgore Trout, time and time again stomping our own muddy footprints upon the rug of this world so that we might force others to behold the only truth each of us has ever really known: “I am here, I am here, I am here.”

I write for myself.  The problem with this is that as soon as you read anything I’ve written, as soon as you discover my existence, you become some sort of fragment of me.  Not a majority stockholder or anything, but you at least get a single share.  I’m not sure I’d ever give up majority interest in myself, but I’m willing to give others a voice in who I am.  Hell, I’d be fooling myself if I truly thought I could even prevent it begin with.  To give you a real say in “me” though, you have to be willing to invest in more shares.  I mean we have something in common.  Whether it is enough to engage each other through this medium I don’t know.  I can send out the signals, but it’s up to you to find them, understand them, and respond.  Basically, I’m an extraterrestrial and you’re Jodie Foster. [1]  Join me.  It could be fun.

So if I am writing for myself, and it is generally sound literary practice to write for your audience, what is that writing going to be like?  It won’t be about my interests.  Not at its core.  I might involve them because it is also sound writing practice to write what one knows, but I am not here to assimilate you to my interests. I could write an entire book on why I love the NBA playoffs, but sometimes I’d just rather say “THEY ARE THE FUCKING GREATEST THING EVUH!” because it more appropriately gets to what I am feeling when I am watching them.  It viscerally feels special and unique.  Still, that wouldn’t make the best blog post.  So in order to justify me writing about anything it must show me some depth that can be reflected or translated to the rest of the society.   I hope to show our passions are rarely enjoyable in and of themselves.  Their beauty is not unique, it just feels that way.  We project our desire for uniqueness on that which we love because we have to some degree assimilated it into our own selves.  So if we can all find that which we love outside of where we’d normally look for it, then we bring each other a little closer together.

I’m not here to appeal to you directly.  If what I am writing about is country music and you love country music, then it is safe to say you are more likely to read it than if I am writing about rap.  The thing is though, I don’t care which one you like.  I don’t even really care which one I like.  Not for the purposes of this particular blog.  It’s about connecting the dots from me to you.  Big picture stuff.  I promise that if I post an article on Starcraft 2 and you don’t even know what that is, that you will find yourself somewhere in its words.

The internet allows you to dive deeply into any one subject.  So much content can be obtained in one specific area that allows you to spend forever exploring a single hallway.  There are online communities for pretty much everything, from people trying to establish completely new lives on Second Life to people who wish to discuss the finer points of ice chewing (something I love doing to my coworker’s dismay).  In ways this connects people who otherwise might not be connected, but it also builds more cliques than a suburban high school.

In high school I never stuck to one clique.  My little brother referred to me as a “floater.”   I’d never heard the term before, but it fits.  I like and hate everything and I’m here to show you why.


[1] And we’ve come to 90’s reference #1 of what will probably soon number in the thousands.  Get used to it.  I think I’ll even compile a list.

One Comment leave one →
  1. August 16, 2011 12:12 am

    allusions to the 90s are the only reason for my existence. Do it

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